辛苦得很不值得.....

要等下次甚麼時候見面?
到那個時候為止怎麼等下去呀?
要是沒有他, 我會一直等下去
明知道不會回來, 但還是會等
再見面的話也不是那麼高興
只不過….
可是他不在我身邊的話感覺很奇怪
下定決心不會等….
但還是會想他
還是會等下去 等他回來
不過等一個人真是好辛苦

說好不會再錯過你的
我也不知道怎麼每到重要的時刻就會錯過你
我覺得很冤枉….
對自己很生氣
所以再也不能認下去了
對 像你說的那樣…
我是一個整天讓你受傷的人
像你說的那樣…
我是一個不懂得怎樣去愛一個人
也不懂得怎樣去表達自己的心意
也不知道怎樣做才能讓你幸福
所以我想過了….
因為我甚麼都不懂
所以…
所以你資叫我做的事我都會去做的
你讓我等的話就等
讓我唱歌的話就唱
讓我跳舞的話就跳
总之你要我做的事我都會去做
按你的要求都做
所以…
不要如此對我…..

@LL i want... is to c your face

All I Want Is To See Your Face
All I want is to see Your face
All I need is a moment of grace
It’s in You that I have the faith
To stand up and be strong
‘Cause I know I’m no longer bound
It’s in You that I have found
Peace of mind, freedom from my sin
And the pow’r to love and forgive

Chorus:
I want to walk with You
Everyday of my life
To talk with You
In the good and the strife
You’re my friend
You’re my Father for all time
Nothing can keep us apart
You’re the lover of my heart

...埋在心的話...

喜歡下雨, 因為你不會知道我流淚...............
喜歡微笑, 因為你不會知道我傷心...............
喜歡堅強, 因為你不會知道我是軟弱...........
喜歡健康, 因為你不會知道我生病了...........
喜歡吃飯, 因為你不會知道其實我沒胃口...
喜歡閃躲, 因為你不會知道我在注意你.......
喜歡發呆, 因為你不會知道我想你..............
喜歡孤單, 因為你不會發現我愛你..............

喜歡在你身邊, 因為你是我快樂的唯一因素 ...

如果上天給我一次機會讓時間倒流, 我希望我能對你說聲 “我愛你”.
如果要我在這感情上限上期限, 我希望是一生一世

@ story from God @

I read this story from an E-mail, yes another story. I want to apologies if you are getting sick of my story. I am a person that likes to read stories because through those small stories I learnt a lot!
While I am in a depression stage, God showed me this story.

An aging master grew tired of his apprentice complaining and so, one morning, sent him for some salt. When the unhappy young man to put a handful of salt into a glass of water and then drink it.

“How does it taste?” the master asked.
“Horrible,” said the apprentice.

The master chuckled and then invited the young man to take same handful of salt and put it into a lake.

The two walked in silence to a nearby lake.
Once the apprentice had swirled his handful of salt in the water, the old man said, “Now drink from the lake.”

As the dripped down the young man’s chin, the master asked, “How does it taste?”

“Fresh,” remarks the apprentice.

“Do you taste the salt?” asked the master.

“No,” said the young man.

At this, the master sat besides the serious young man and explained:

“The obstacles in life are like pure salt; no more, mo less. The number of obstacles you face in life may be the same but the amount of bitterness you taste depends on the container you put the obstacles in life, the only thing you can do is to enlarge your sense of things. Stop being a glass. Become a lake instead.”

% - u Raised me Up - %

這個星期是我最難過的一個星期…. 寫下這blog 的時候才星期一, 我真的把接下來的日子完完全全的交透給上帝…. 好累哦… 如不是主賜予我力量, 我相信我再也不是現在的我….

這場”戰爭”真的差點把我打敗, 可是… 可是… 感謝上帝的力量… 死撒旦, 你等著瞧, 勝利會站在我這…. 雖然現在勝利者仿佛是你, 但我是永不放棄! 我, 現在決對不是讓步而這是上帝要我經過的… 辛苦, 可是我很清楚明白主正在磨練我, 必竟上帝會為我安排….. 時間會証明一切…. 等著瞧吧…

這”戰爭”對我來說是很難打勝戰, 因為媽媽真的很難搞! 無論我做甚麼, 說甚麼, 都是錯…好壓力…. 有些時候我本身很懷疑, 懷疑我是否做的不夠或許是我做的完全就是錯誤 (是指家務)…. 做幾乎每樣事都會被責罵 但我心里現在很清楚的明白媽媽所作的一切一切都是為了我好.. 一步一步的, 上帝讓我看見父母親是多麼的偉大….

在這樣的情況下, 我其實很想找朋友來分擔以及禱告… 可是真的很難很難找到一位了解我心情的….. 我曾經找過朋友訴苦, 但我發覺除了上帝沒人能真正了解我的情況, 除非你把你自己完完全全的放入我的”鞋子”里…. 不會埋怨朋友不明白因為每個人都有不同的經歷, 不同的想法….我還會告訴他們我最近的生活, 雖然有時我不會如何形容我的景況但我很感謝主讓我看見身邊關心我的人…. 感謝他們的禱告以關懷… 我知道因我的事麻煩到很多很多弟兄姐妹, 我乘此機會向大家道歉… 特別是小組的會員….

在我最低落的時候多謝弟兄姐妹的關懷和話語….. 最重要的是感謝阿爸天父!! 在同時間, 我聽見了這首英文歌…. 對我而言是多麼的有意議…. 和大家分享吧, 希望你們喜歡….

You raised me upBy Josh Gorban
When I am down and oh my soul so weary
When troubles come and my heart burdened be
Then I am still and wait here in the silence
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

You raised me up
So I can stand on mountains.
You raised me up
To walk on stormy seas.
I am strong when I am on your shoulders.
You raised me up
To more than I can be.

(repeat chorus x 3)
As we sail through life, don’t avoid storms and rough waters. Just let it pass, just sail. Always remember, calm seas never make skillful sailors.

- ( FooTst3P ) -

FOOT PRINTS

One night I had a dream.
I dreamt I walking along the beach with god

and across the sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene, I noticed two steps of footprints in the sand;

one belonged to me, the other to god.

When the last scene of my life flashed before us,
I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that many times along the path of life,

there was only one set of footprints.
I also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in my life.

This really bothered me and questioned god about it.
"God, you said that once I decided to follow you,

you would walk with me all the way,

but I noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life there is only one set of footprints.

I don't understand why in times when I needed you most, you would leave".

God replied, "my precious, precious child, I love you; I would never, never leave you during your times of trial & suffering.When you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you."

.............the end...........

This story always encouragement me, I hope its will do the same towards you.. god bless..

I am someone

I am only one, but I am still one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something. And because I cannot do everything I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.

- Helen Keller -

Praise to the Lord

Give praise to the Lord! Today is our first day of Cell Group (CG) in Bukit Jalil! Today is also my first time going to CG without the help of Ewilly! Hallelujah! I even fetched 2 persons there! Even though my car “sei fo” twice but I still want to give thanks to the Lord as I arrived there safe and sound…. Lesson… Do not be panic when you drive manual car, although you are late…. DO NOT PANIC!!! When I go back home that time, everything was smooth, thank God!

Yes, I am late for CG. I want to take this opportunity to say sorry to Li On, and both Michael. Due to my lateness, the CG started late and the worst part is I made Michael and Li On late! Sorry… apologies accepted?

Today is a blessed day, we have many visitors! Sophia’s mom, Lai Kang, Sophia, and my “cute little” brother Desmond were there! Seeking forgiveness from Brother Desmond, as I said I am not close to him… but that is the truth! Hehe… I do not know what is your favorite foods, color etc. HOWEVER, I do know something about you….. He… got a very WEIRD way to keep his money in his wallet! For more information., go ask him yourself haha… (Desmond, I am actually “promoting” you, hahaha… see, this type of sister where to find… one and only… =P )

I was touched by the Lord through Sophia’s mom, I... Actually never hug my mom before but on that very day, I felt I was hugging my mom! How I wished that moment never ended. When she pray, I keep on inviting Holy Spirit to fill me and when I hug her, my tears was pouring like rain~! There has been a while whereby I felt so relief, handling all my burdens, problems into God’s hand. I was happy and I can feel the peace in my heart.

I didn’t joint them for “mamak session” after the CG as I have now prohibited myself to go back home after 12 am. I want my life to be a good testimonial; I want my life to glorify His mighty name; I want to touch others’ life with my life testimonial; I want a life that please God; I want a life whereby His words are always followed.

Well people who know me well should know I have “buta malam”, meaning I can hardly see things at night. It is very dangerous and because of that, I don’t like to drive at night. Once I stepped out of Ewilly’s house, my mouth can’t stop praying for journey mercy, I don’t know why also… I pray, I pray, and I pray… When I started my car, and I reverse the car in a straight, but suddenly when I almost reach the opposite side of the parking space, my hand suddenly turn the steering slowly according to clockwise. I change the reverse gear to gear 1 and to my horror, when I suddenly look at my right hand side, there’s a car parked there! I don’t even know there’s a car there when I reverse my car! If I had not turned the steering, I will probably meet another accident! Now I know the reason I was praying non-stop! Praise the Lord! Hallelujah!

I learnt a lot today, a lot, a lot… I will put faith in God as He has great plans for me… As it is written in the bible.

“for I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” [Jeremiah 29:11]

I shall stand firm!!!!!

~~ @sKiNg 4 MoR3 ~~

致 YL,

如果你真的花了時間看了我這個 blog 我很想對你說聲對不起…. 因為拖了別人傳話給你, 告訴你我寫了這個 blog 給你…. 我很想自己本身告訴你, 可是我真的辦不到….我是從 “那天” 開始, 已不放希望在你身上…. 即使你沒看這個 blog 我也不會覺得傷心或難過…. 因為我已站了起來….


最近, 我在 Friendster 里想要尋找一位朋友的時候, 我發現原來你已刪除了我…. 在那一剎那間, 我的心很痛, 可是我現在很清楚知道, 那已不關我的事了…. 那是你的自由, 我不能說任何東西…. 現在, 在我的生活里, 你幾乎不存在了…. 一切都已不重要了….


即使你要這樣, 我可以要求你一件事嗎? 不用擔心因為我知道這件事你一定能辦得到…. 那就是在你的 MSN 及 Yahoo Messagers 里头也做出同樣的事, 我覺得你已刪除了我, 可是我希望你能 block 了我…. 不要單單刪除而是要刪除及 block! 因為我做不到所以才拜託你…. 對你而言, 我已很久不在你的天空里出現, 所以這樣的要求不會太過份吧… 我真的希望你能夠成全我….. 我掙扎了很久才能從跌倒中爬起來, 我不想再回想以前的生活…. 很幸福可是那只不過是暫時的幸福…. 我不想擁有那種愛…. 很辛苦…. 因為看到你在掙扎….. 我忍受不住….

我祝福你和你的女朋友…..